Thursday, July 10, 2008

Crotches: So Last Year?

So there are some fads that end all of a sudden. Remember Ja Rule? People used to love that guy. A LOT. Then one day 50 Cent starts talking 'bout how Ja Rule's crap and whip snap back lash hits poor Ja hard. He's over and hasn't been back since. But then there are little trends that go real gentle into that good night, so softly that you don't notice they're over until a while later.

Watching 106 and Park's throwback track today, it hit me. The golden age of the crotch is over.

Ciara's Promise video, starting at 2:22 is a big ol' crotchfest for a good forty seconds. And weirdly, that's the part of the video that looks dated.

Ciara - Promise



And remember when Ri Ri was all crotch, all the time? I do. It's not that these moves are weren't around before, but they're were made more obvious by season after season of skinny jeans and leggings as a major part of the silhouette of du jour. And, let's not ignore the more than a little porny overtones. I believe in art theory, they call that 'leading lines'. While the crotch squat isn't at all a new look, seeing these Ciara work it and still look like a strong person with, you know, some personality and junk as opposed a big ol' blow up doll was...neat. Maybe? Maybe.

Little Miss Sunshine has been all long, upright lines in her live show lately, and that works beautifully with her revamped semi-rock chick swagger. And check the Girls Around the World video - there you have what sexbots look like right this minute, and there are hardly any thrusting nethers at all. Well, unless you count the big pink space-vulva constellation. But that's really just a whole other story, and has more to do with "What Would Freud Say About Hype Williams" than I'd like to go into right now. (Seriously, though. A giant pulsing rosebud*, Hype? Really?)

But the point is, this little trendlet seems to be gone baby gone. And that might not be a bad thing - because while a little thrusting on the dance floor is the friend of everyone, leading with the crotch too much? In practice it can end up looking like this:





*This song was more or less the shit, though.